Reading butch blogs, I wonder
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...if I might not really be just a butch woman?

an ontd post y'all should read, and star trek rpf/rps (pinto) recs you're probs gonna ignore
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This is just. Really funny.

LAQUEENTO DARES TO WALK SOMEWHERE WITHOUT CHRIS PINE, I AM NOW VERSUS HIM

Zachary Quinto (aka "LaQueento") is the guy who plays Spock in the new Trek movie (also Sylar of Heroes fame), and Chris Pine is the guy who plays Kirk. There's a small but dedicated group of fans who desperately want them to be a couple. I'm...not really sure why? But I like the fic that comes out of it, so that's okay. And this ^^ above, well. It speaks for itself.

Recs! (Not that anyone who reads this journal is going to read these stories...)

recommendations for your viewing pleasureCollapse )




The beginning of a series on AWESOME FEMALE CHARACTERS
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First off, a list of ten of my favorites, in no order.

1. Maude (Harold and Maude)
2. Catwoman (Batman: Year One, especially)
3. Sue Trinder (Fingersmith)
4. Wanda (A Game of You)
5. Faith (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
6. Marceline the Vampire Queen (Adventure Time)
7. Helena (A Midsummer Night's Dream)
8. Moll Flanders
9. Sally Sparrow (Doctor Who)
10. Artemis (Greek mythology)

Violence against Transfolk, poetry, zine
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lots of stuff, ZINE ZINE ZINECollapse )

Just thought everyone should know about this.
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THE MONTCLARION
THE STUDENT VOICE OF MONTCLAIR STATE UNIVERSITY SINCE 1928

What turns girls on the most?

Category : Feature
 

The Weekly Debate

He Said
What a question for the all the men out there! I, like most men, wish the answer to this was simple. Then we wouldn’t have to put so much effort into mastering the skill of sex.
When entering the bedroom to spend the night with a pretty lady (we hope), or if you’re lucky enough to squeeze morning sex somewhere in the hectic early hours, be ready for any and everything.
If this is a girl who you know, then hopefully you’ll know how she will react in the bedroom.
If the girl is crazy to begin with, then the blissful experience will be an experience filled with quirkiness.
This could go from pulling her hair, to calling her by her mother’s name. Sounds odd, but it happens.
Now, if this is one of those random drunk chicks you pick up outside the bar that can barely stand, it’s a crapshoot.
At this point, start off slow. Don’t jump right in and think she’s going to want to do any crazy sex positions.
You don’t want the girl to take control because we are the males and are in charge, but in this case it might work.
Otherwise, you might scare her off in the middle of sex, or she could wake up the next morning, not remembering you or the night before.
In general, start off slow. A kiss on the face that leads to other sexual body parts works. Go with simple, straight forward sex. As the act progresses, see where it takes you both.
This is the point where you can say, “Let’s try doggy style,” or, “Can my female friend join?”
Wait until the sexual release has been completed before asking these questions, just in case it creeps the girl out and she leaves. At least you got it in still, even if it was short.
Share

Comments (45)

Stef Said On 03-11-2011
Wow! This article is so incredibly misogynistic and portraying men in such a negative light! I also find it funny how it has no byline. This article is not professional or respectful at all.
Kari Andrade Said On 03-11-2011
My question is, how many girls have you taken to bed willingly and who are confident? It seems like to me that the only girls you turn on are those with low self-esteem. Sad really. Give yourself a challenge and dare to use chivalry and what ever intellectual skills you have. And if you lack them, don’t worry, you can take the time to learn them.
I challenge you to seek a confident female by using your brain. Hell, you may even enjoy her company beyond sex if you’re not shallow. In my experience, considerate and intelligent males turn me on..plus they make better lovers anyways.
 
Claire Said On 03-11-2011
Ok there’s some seriously problematic stuff going on this article.
For instance:
“if this is one of those random drunk chicks you pick up outside the bar that can barely stand, it’s a crapshoot.”
If this is a random drunk chick you pick up and you are worried that she’s so drunk that she doesn’t understand what’s going on or that you worry she may not remember you in the morning- you probably should not be having sex with her. Consent is important- and consent can’t be fully established during super drunk sex. Be mindful of the ways in which sleeping with someone who is too drunk to tell you no, is in fact- rape.
“You don’t want the girl to take control because we are the males and are in charge, but in this case it might work.”
Ok- what the hell? Where does this terrible misogynistic attitude come from? Seriously? Fearing women taking control? In the bedroom? Whatever happened to sex being a shared experience of each others wants? And, letting a lady be in control can be hella hot. But- you should be at LEAST listening to her and what she’s ok with and what she wants and what she doesn’t want. ASK HER! Asking people ‘Is this ok when I kiss you here?’ ect. ect. and checking in like that is super sexy. Piggish I AM MAN I AM STRONG I FUCK YOU LIKE A MAN attitudes are not.
Stef Said On 03-11-2011
Kari and Claire: I just wanted to say that I love your comments.
 
Corinne Said On 03-11-2011
Here’s a fucking tip bud, you’re looking for what women want in bed?
HINT: It’s NOT a creepy, misogynistic date rapist who not only selects women based on their looks (pretty lady? really dude?) but waits until they’re inebriated at a bar before using them for ridiculous sex that benefits him solely before tossing them aside, only to repeat the same process over again.
HINT: Women want men who RESPECT them, who understand that they’re more than body parts.
So essentially, not you.
I can’t believe the Montclarion would even condone such blatant and obnoxious sexism.
Jane Said On 03-11-2011
You know what turns women on…? Respect and decency. It’s not that difficult. Sex is a shared experience. Get her consent, ask her what she wants. Don’t EVER mess with someone who may be too drunk to consent- it doesn’t matter who ‘takes charge’ or who’s on top. That’s worse than a ‘crapshoot’, that’s rape. Don’t try to guess what anyone wants. Just ask her.
And “At least you got it in still, even if it was short”? Please don’t rationalize sex this way. It’s a really horrible attitude. This entire article makes it sound like you’re trying to trap a girl for fear that she might be scared of you otherwise, and that’s not good.
 
Kari Andrade Said On 03-11-2011
Thanks :) I do it for the ladies ;) lol
Stef Said On 03-11-2011
Great comment Corinne.
I don’t understand how a man is supposed to know what women want, which was my first reaction to this article. Then I realized how offensive this is.
But still, having no byline pretty much shows that you know that the article is offensive and wrong. The author is not standing by the argument and is pretty much hiding behind anonymity.
 
Kari Andrade Said On 03-11-2011
To add to Jane comment, lol even if it short? Are your really sure you want to give that TMI information? Not looking good for you at all bud.
Also to clarify something :
http://www.freedomfromfear.org/viewtopic.asp?topic_id=273
Long read but you should read the fact that having sex with an intoxicated female is illegal.
Stef Said On 03-11-2011
Great comment as well, Jane. I agree.
 
Liouxsie Dee Said On 03-11-2011
Let me start by saying, I’m not the angriest feminist you’ll meet. After forwarding this article and reposting it on every venue of the internet I could think of to gauge the sentiment of other people on this piece, I’ve come to the same conclusion: I’m mad now. I appreciate the Montclarion for what it provides–student voices covering issues that concern other students. This issue, more specifically this piece, profoundly disturbed me. Not only does the female’s perspective give a dumbed-down, overly glossy voice to the “typical” female at Montclair State, but the male’s perspective is simply horrifying.
An article condoning or glamorizing date rape and mocking female sexuality shouldn’t represent “a typical guy’s perspective”. Rape isn’t “typical”, and should be accepted as a mainstream ideal. Perhaps most insulting of all is the fact that this was placed alongside articles condemning rape culture, and even RAINN statistics about sexual assault (both features I loved)–almost implying that writing about having sex with a woman who “can barely stand” isn’t the same as rape.
As a feminist, I’m horrified and angry that this perspective could even exist in “this day and age” in a so-called “post-feminist” world. As the President of a political organization, I’m prompted to encourage students at MSU that this piece demands a second reading with heightened attention to the misogynistic, violent details. And as a person, I’m deeply saddened. I’ve already received calls, texts, an in-person visit, e-mails, and Facebook messages about this article from men and women alike.
And to the author of this article, I would hope that the you carry with you a deeper understanding of the First Amendment. Free speech does not equal hate speech, and misogyny translates simply to the hatred of women. It is an increasingly “typical girl’s” perspective that this is Not how to turn on a girl.
Kari Andrade Said On 03-11-2011
And further clarification : Sex with ANYONE while intoxication is illegal.
 
Colleen Worthington Said On 03-11-2011
Whoever wrote this should be fired, and everyone at The Montclairion should be deeply, deeply ashamed. With this one, thoughtless, misogynistic article, you’ve successfully turned your Sexual Assault Awareness issue into a huge joke.
I can’t even comprehend this level of ineptitude.
Gross Said On 03-11-2011
This is truly disgusting. Who raised you?
 
Kari Andrade Said On 03-11-2011
Well the main issue of this article is that it is condoning an illegal act. That is the main point that is the most disturbing of all. And that you cannot hide behind freedom of speech.
Ni Said On 03-11-2011
I wasn’t born with enough middle fingers to properly express how this article makes me feel. Whoever thought this was a good idea needs to go to their room and think about what they’ve done.
 
Jo Said On 03-11-2011
I am truly ashamed that my school allowed this to be published.
The message this sends about what our school supports its horrible and embarrassing.
There is nothing witty or funny about this. It is sending the message that women (not “girls”)
are objects for men to get off with. It is saying that it is okay to take advantage of women
who are under the influence and it is portraying men in a negative light as well.
The fact that the authors name was not published just shows that whoever approved it knows
it is completely disrespectful and wrong in so many ways. I am truly disgusted by this and I hope
it is not only taken down, but an apology should follow, whoever approved it should be reprimanded,
and whoever wrote it needs some serious counseling.
Stef Said On 03-11-2011
Well, it may be condoning an illegal act, but it’s also condoning taking advantage of, mocking, and harming women, which is wrong whether it is considered illegal or not.
As a side note, this piece isn’t even well written in my opinion.
 
Ruby Said On 03-11-2011
Wow.
This is horribly, disgustingly vile.
For the record, no, none of us ladies like being raped. If the only way you can get a woman to consent having sex with you is to ger her drunk, you already know you’re doing soemthing wrong. People can’t consent when they’re drunk.
“You don’t want the girl to take control because we are the males and are in charge”
Oh. Fucking
wow.
No, you are literally sexist and a horrible person.
You are the type of man mothers tell their daughters to look out for. You are literally the reason why men get such a bad rep.
Stop disgracing your entire gender with your promotion of rape and sexism.
You know why most women don’t have casual sex?
Because we have to worry about whether or not guys we meet on the street think rape is cool or not and think women need to be controlled. People like you. If we didn’t have to fucking worry about douchebags like you existing, more men would get laid. Because then we wouldn’t have to worry about whether the guy who’s asking us out relaly just wants to rape us and then throw us in a dich somewhere and we’ll end up on the morning news the next day with people wondering “WELL WHAT DID SHE EXPECT GOING HOME WITH A STRANGER”
Mag Said On 03-11-2011
Having sex with a barely concious girl? Terribly classy. And by classy I mean you’re promoting rape. So just terrible.
 
Kandy Said On 03-11-2011
You know how to master “the skill of sex”? Get a person’s consent first. That’s a good start.
Also “we are the males and are in charge”? Uhm, no.
Mary Said On 03-11-2011
So… Why don’t we want the woman to take control…? because it’s threatening to you to have sexual advances made on you by an independent and secure woman?
And how was this allowed to even have been published?
Yo. Fuck you. Why don’t you just ask the girl what she likes? Like straight up. That’s what we like. Fucking ASK US.
And quit picking up nasty drunk girls, they can’t consent, and it’s fucking gross and looks really bad on your track record.
I would never fuck you even if you DID know what you were talking about because you’re freaking sexist.
 
Ashley Said On 03-11-2011
Good job being a terrible human being.
Mara Said On 03-11-2011
omg i just have nothing to say…actually i do but i rather not say it but will try to find ho wrote this article.
 
Franco Said On 03-11-2011
How is this even an article in the montclarion? If this writer represents the kind of guys that are getting girls at montclair state, then this is tragic. As a man who respects women and any sexual acts that I engage in with them, I am really disappointed in what I’m reading.
Grace Said On 04-11-2011
I’m not only offended, I’m seriously disturbed. I don’t understand how something like this could actually be printed… the Montclarion should remove this and apologize for publishing such a disgusting, sexist opinion. This article is condoning rape. This is not okay.
 
Kari Andrade Said On 04-11-2011
Agreed Mara^ attacking with insults is something this boy is probably use to. Intelligence is not. Go to the source.
And as for you sir, when you have a daughter, a niece, or someone you care about that is of the female gender, you will start to realize how destructive these behaviors are ( this is assuming that you are simply a college kid and not some sexually ill individual) I get it. It is the ” college ” lifestyle party mentality. I remember my undergrad as well. But I’ve seen those behaviors bite people in the ass. Don’t kid yourself and don’t stoop to that level. This behavior is cowardly and there is nothing manly about it. Do you really want to still be “that guy” 5 years, 10 years, 20 years from now? That will stay with you. Reasoning may be futile but in my experience you could be that one college kid who thinks he knows everything and is reacting to whatever ” Your bros” say. Let see in 5 years kiddo. Food for thought…and you don’t want to get arrested or a bad rep either with the whole drunk thing…trust me a guy I knew did that, he had to transfer . Word spreads like a bad STD.
Why Said On 04-11-2011
Thanks for giving our school a great representation on the internet. Why was this allowed to be posted? This needs to be taken down as soon as possible. Grow up.
 
Lawny Said On 04-11-2011
“we are the males and are in charge”
Are you freaking kidding me?! Good luck actually having a long term relationship with that kind of attitude. No wonder you’ve resorted to random sex with girls who are too drunk to remember.
Liz Said On 04-11-2011
I’m really ashamed to call myself one of your classmates. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but this is a FEATURE article, not even an editorial. Shame on you Montclarion for letting this bigoted, misogynistic trash be published in our OFFICIAL periodical.
 
Lauren Said On 04-11-2011
This article is trash. From the implications that rape is okay, to the pure lack of knowledge of what actually turns a woman on, this article is misogynistic and just plain incorrect.
So, what does turn a woman on?
Most definitely not this:
“Wait until the sexual release has been completed before asking these questions, just in case it creeps the girl out and she leaves. At least you got it in still, even if it was short.”
With my crazy girl mind, I have translated it into:
“Wait until the boy orgasms before bothering to ask the partner how she feels about the whole matter. Because women are scared of sex, and are uncomfortable with the whole matter. Therefore, it does not matter one little bit what she thinks, because she is not going to enjoy it anyway. At least the dude got laid. High five to you, sir.”
I’m sorry, I thought this article was about how to turn on a woman and respect her enough so that sex becomes a fun experience for both partners. I did not realize that this was an article that promoted simply fucking what is basically an inanimate object. Might as well be your own hand.
If you really think that a woman should just keep a stiff upper lip and just lie there, then why bother having sex? You are clearly missing the whole notion of willing consent, and partnership, and connection with your partner, as well as a willingness and a desire to get to know exactly what turns your partner on. Just some of the stuff that makes sex so enjoyable, other than the animalistic pleasure. Because I am not sexist enough to believe that all men are just in it for the physical act.
I’m not even going to get into the whole business of consent, because my fellow posters have covered it. I just need to state that it is rape if either partner is too inebriated. I don’t know where the legal line is drawn, but it has been clearly crossed if the woman or man is too drunk to walk or even remember the evening. Respect for your partner is so important.
Nick Said On 04-11-2011
Whoever wrote this is seriously a pathetic individual.
 
Allison Said On 04-11-2011
This is disgusting, mysoginistic and disgusting. Good to know Montclair university encourages disgusting acts like this. I know where not to go for an education.
Lyss Said On 04-11-2011
Ok…
I agree 110% with every comment above mine but need to put my 2 cents in just because I am so shocked.
To the author-
Aside from the illegal aspects of this idiotic article, it is obvious you do not get women (mentally or literally you must not get action). Any normal guy knows a woman in charge of her sexuality is hot as hell! And every woman is different. Maybe the only the ones you get to know are “crapshoots” and maybe you have the wonderful fortune of at least knowing what a quickie is like but any real sex worth writing about is definitely not anything like what you have described.
If I were you- I’d stick to what I know which for you is clearly not sex. Take a tip from a real woman (and I promise u I’m not some drunk chick from a bar) there is a lot more to sex than a kiss on the face, doggie, or a threesome with ur female friend…
To the dudes who read this- congrats u just learned what NOT to do.
 
Lyss Said On 04-11-2011
Ok…
I agree 110% with every comment above mine but need to put my 2 cents in just because I am so shocked.
To the author-
Aside from the illegal aspects of this idiotic article, it is obvious you do not get women (mentally or literally you must not get action). Any normal guy knows a woman in charge of her sexuality is hot as hell! And every woman is different. Maybe the only the ones you get to know are “crapshoots” and maybe you have the wonderful fortune of at least knowing what a quickie is like but any real sex worth writing about is definitely not anything like what you have described.
If I were you- I’d stick to what I know which for you is clearly not sex. Take a tip from a real woman (and I promise u I’m not some drunk chick from a bar) there is a lot more to sex than a kiss on the face, doggie, or a threesome with ur female friend…
To the dudes who read this- congrats u just learned what NOT to do.
J.M.F.D. Said On 04-11-2011
When I was first approached about this article, I have to admit, I thought it was a joke since it seems like this is quite clearly a guide on how to never have sex again.
Or be with a loving partner for that matter.
Ever again.
I think it is a good thing that it was published if only to show that some people really think like this. A scary truth, sure, but there are people like this out there. There could have been a disclaimer or a footnote emphasizing that this was a single person’s opinion and did not reflect the tone of the university. Frankly, even with that in place, it still does sound like misogynistic dribble.
And, no, I do not like nor appreciate the fact that rape made it onto a list of ‘turn-ons’.
 
Unknown Said On 04-11-2011
i kind of feel ashamed i go to a college with such ignorant people such as this creep
Reggie Seradly Said On 04-11-2011
Ok, call me a prude or whatever, but I am disgusted that an official student newspaper would post anything of this nature in the first place.
But besides that, the nature and tone of this… “article”… is horrifying.
A few points might hold some truth: yes, it is true that women are often attracted to “dominant males”. But that doesn’t imply the same thing as recommended in this “article”.
This article is a call for callous scumbaggery on the part of men. As for women… it hopes you’ll be foolish enough to be intoxicated around such people, so you can be used with ease.
What a disgusting way to look at not only women, but the whole male-female relationship! What a nihilistic and horrible aspiration, to be the man who follows the advice in this “article” with success!
Furthermore, it is upsetting that such a man (an “Admin”, apparently) would even be in college in the first place! Such a low-brow and poorly written piece might always have been expected from the scumbag, anti-social underclass, but now apparently it is acceptable form for the future leaders of this country!
New proof then, that this country is as dead as chivalry. What a hideous path, our decline.
 
Fawzia Afzal-Khan Said On 04-11-2011
As Director of Women and Gender Studies at MSU, I agree with the sentiments of anger and disgust posted by many students in response to the piece asking “how is a man supposed to know what a woman wants.” The answer to the question is simple (as many have said): ASK. I would add, GET TO KNOW women as FRIENDS, and HUMAN BEINGS first, before thinking about how to get them into your bed for a one-night stand, hoping the woman is so drunk she wont refuse your advances. How can that make you feel good or excited? Dont you want to be respected and recognized as a real person post-sex, or are you as a man, content to remain a stranger who can be picked up so easily and for one purpose only? Think about what you are saying about YOURSELF–and implicating other men as well–as nothing but sex fiends, without humanity. Is this really who YOU are?? So while, like the others who have been posting comments, I I too am horrified at your misogynistic attitude which is so demeaning and endangering to women, I am equally horrified and frankly, concerned for YOU and for any men who may subscribe to your point of view. If you truly hold such views, you will turn into a lonely, sad and embittered shell of a person, unable to discover the joys of an equal, mutually respectful relationship with someone who is a partner, not a piece of meat. You will never know what it means to be a human being yourself, as you will remain unable to see others as in that light. THINK about that before uttering more drivel that can only bring you more opprobrium and alienation from your peers and mentors alike. READ, THINK, and finally, GROW UP.
Alex Said On 04-11-2011
Did the editors even bother to READ this trash. This is disgusting. You should be ashamed.
 
Ana Said On 04-11-2011
This is seriously disgusting for so many different reasons. I can’t believe someone actually believes this stuff.
Samantha Said On 04-11-2011
First, thank you, to my fellow peers for responding so strongly to this–it is nice to see that others share my sentiments and that you are not passive, asleep students just going through the motions.
Second, when will the Montclarion cease to ask questions in the Weekly Debate that have to do with relationship issues, sex, etc.? (“Should I have Sex with my Ex?”, “What are the rules for a summer fling?, “Is he in it for the long run”) Honestly, it is so pathetic that we are wasting space in a paper on this nonsense. Start asking us questions that are actually going to challenge us to form/share our opinions on things that really matter. And if you are going to ask those questions, please make it worth our while to read.
 
Samantha Said On 04-11-2011
Oh and another thing… we are WOMEN not girls.
Lisa Said On 04-11-2011
I hope your dick falls off.
 
Lisa Said On 04-11-2011
Also shame on the montclarion for framing a “debate” in such a narrow way. This is not a debate and does not represent “boys” or “girls” and it definitely does not represent anything beyond close minded heterosexuality. Debates are not two uninformed idiots rambling about their own stupidity. Debates need to be backed by facts, thoughtfulness, and intellect. Maybe you should make a new section where you interview dumbest people on campus because that’s pretty much what you did here. Also I think the creep who wrote his should be reported to the police because he pretty much admitted to rape.


Bailey: Zine now accepting emo shit.
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Just for you.

THE END.

Mad Men
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Mad Men is a really good show.


The sexism is so casual! It's ridiculous!


I love Peggy Olson and Joan Holloway. Peggy especially. I'm ambivalent about Don; he cheats on his wife too much. And Pete Campbell is just horrifying.

T
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I talked to my psychiatrist about testosterone the other day, what I wanted out of it, what I didn't want, planning to make a chart of how often I want it, etc, and she was very listen-y and supportive. She told me she's not an expert with hormones and gender identity, so we'd have to look for an endocrinologist to supplement my chemical intake, make sure things didn't interfere with my other medications, all that. I've already got websites saved with lists of endos in the area, so I'm pretty prepared for that! :D Also she mentioned finding a therapist with experience dealing with gender identity, which, I don't know, might mean I'd have to give up my current therapist? Whom I adore, so that would be sad. Maybe I could just work things out with my current one. I mean, she could do research or something, right? o_o


Anyway, I feel very optimistic about this right now!



Although my psych did tell me just to think about having a good first month of school right now. :P Which I am.

I complain a lot on LJ
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 And I'm not stopping now.

DAMN I WISH I COULD PASS AS A MAN.

Thing is, I bet my *body* could pass, with my binder and a pair of socks. It's my goddamn face that throws me off. Maybe I just need a better haircut?

This causes me a lot of stress when I'm in boy mode.

"What DO you know?" "English."
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 Best line from C&A. Especially since it's Daniel Craig, and there's a bit of meta there where he actually, IRL, speaks "English" English. You know?

In other news, gay porn is THE BEST.

?

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